Saints of Virtue: Ode to the Christian FPS from Hell
Ephesians 6:10-20
I grew up in the evangelical-laced American south. Not only that, but I grew up in the long shadow of Columbine and the association of first-person shooter (FPS) games with juvenile hypnosis.
I distinctly remember being 10 years old and getting in trouble for playing 007 Goldeneye on the youth group’s N64 before service. There was something about the art and pace and maybe even the taboo nature of this style of game that made me want more.
Something I can recall is watching the kids playing Goldeneye and internally foaming at the mouth. What a rush.
That following Christmas, the last gift my mom wanted me open ended up, to my surprise, being a FPS game. The Christian game of esoteric spiritual warfare, Saints of Virtue.
Up until this point I had really only barely dipped my toe in the water of video games. I had played Dig Dug, the psychotropic Lego Island, Age of Empires, the frustrating Myst on my uncle’s desktop, and of course the forbidden Goldeneye. But this game felt different to me, and I hadn’t even played it yet.
I went through the installation process and as soon as I ran the game, I was greeted by the weird intro ever. A child stands in his room as a camera spins around him. He’s talking to himself as a strong echo is on his voice, signifying that this is indeed an inner voice. All of a sudden you see a tunnel and the worst fake AC/DC-ish song blare. You are tunneling into his mind. You see beasts and floating heads. One head has an earth fixed to the back of its skull; another has electricity in its brain. Another head has a powdered wig. Another takes multiple forms and is meant to represent the “New Age” movement.
I was hooked.
To be frank with you, dear reader, I think this game is amazing. As dumb as it is, there is a liminal nature to it that cannot be beat. The design, the villains, the jarring nature of the initial song followed by very little background music. The fact that most of the game is either set in a shopping mall, catacombs, movie theaters only displaying static, temples and gardens. The schizophrenic direction of the entire project is enough to make you pay attention.
The actual game mechanics are trash. Your only weapon in the game is a sword that shoots for Christ-sakes. As a game, it sucks. But I love it. My brother and I would play it incessantly and would tell all of our friends to get it. They never did because they were off playing honestly, better games. But this game made me fall in love with the genre even more and really ignited my imagination.
There is little known about the developer, Shine Studios. A vague website that has random scripture verses and links to Christian thinktanks. No sort of bio or success story. No founder. No other titles. There’s only Saints of Virtue.
The game was released in 1999 which depending on the date, it either predicted the inner turmoil of the Columbine shooters or was a direct response to it. I mean, the entire game is giving off massive incel vibes. This young man is tormented and has to turn to esoteric internal spiritual warfare in order to combat the violence of his mind.
It’s pretty easy to see that this game in some ways was a way for mainstream Christianity to attempt to combat the “spirit of the age.” An attempt at offering a solution and rationalizing the bloodshed of children by children.
This game made me fall in love with FPS even more than I already was. It made me see that games could make me think. Games could be a way of processing my surroundings, sorting my thoughts, and even mythologizing something that seemed mundane.
I still play a lot of vintage inspired FPS. Here are my current favorites in no particular order.
Cruelty Squad
I feel like this game consumed so much of my time last year. Absolutely addictive and inventive, CS is a crazy synergy of satire, cultural critique, gore, schizo art, imaginative maps, and even a target who is obsessed with Funkos.
You play as a protagonist who is essentially an Uber for assassinations/hits. As you play you can harvest organs from your enemies and earn money by selling them and fish (yes, you can go fishing) on the stock market. You use that money to buy add-ons that are either practical, useless, or cosmetic. I’m actually really underselling it here. Sales was never my thing. You should just buy it and play it ASAP
DUS
K
I actually love this one just as equally as I love CS, but it presents an entirely different vibe. In some ways you would look at DUSK and assume it’s a Quake clone. It’s really more of an homage than a clone. Combining all of the fun of vintage FPS with a feel that feels more nuanced and modern, DUSK is a whirlwind. You will battle cultists, possessed soldiers, scarecrows with shotguns, livestock that spit blood, and so much more. Taking on a more gothic feel to the entire thing, aesthetically I feel like this could appeal to more people than CS. I’m OBSESSED with this game.
Post Void
I have NOT gotten good at this game at all. It is fast paced, overstimulating and unlike anything I’ve ever played before. It is also the cheapest game on the list at only $2.99. If you are prone to seizures DO NOT PLAY THIS GAME. But Jesus, it’s fun so far
GAMES I HAVEN’T PLAYED BUT I HEAR ARE FUN:
Wrought Flesh
Incision
Neon White
HYPER DEMON
if you want to get into other vintage FPS, may I suggest:
Doom(duh), Doom II, Doom III, Doom 64, Quake, Redneck Rampage, Half Life, 007 Goldeneye, Catechumen (another Christian game that seems to blend themes from Elder Scrolls and Saints of Virtue), Unreal Gold.
if you want to play Saints of Virtue you can look it up here. I am not savvy enough to figure out how to get it to run on my computer yet. But when I do I guarantee that I will play it nonstop.
THE BATTLEFIELD IS OF THE MIND
- b
SAINTS OF VIRTUE WALTHROUGH: